Current Emotions

This is gonna be a bit of a rant and/or emotional mishmash, but I just wanna get this off my chest. Here goes.

So there's this girl. Yeah, yeah, one of these posts. Hear me out.

I really like her. And I kinda have a feeling she likes me too. She and I lock eyes a lot in the one class we both have together, and she tends to stand close to me, and I pick up those bits of conversation that make me wonder whether she's flirting or just being nice. But my guess is I'm wrong. She's dating a guy (thank you, Facebook) and their profile pictures are of the two of them together. I'm sure they're perfectly happy together and talking to her about how I feel would probably just result in an awkward conversation that would lead to an awkward friendship, and she seems like she'll be an awesome friend. I don't wanna ruin that.
 
But then the "what if's?" come a -calling.

"What if you two would be great together?"

"What if she secretly likes you too?"

"What if she's been thinking about dumping her boyfriend for a while now?"

It's not like any of that really matters anyhow.

In all honesty, I just want honesty. All I want to know is how she feels, but I know that asking her how she feels is going to mean I need to admit my feelings. And I don't want to risk crushing this blooming friendship.

My current emotions suck. A lot.

Wish Me Luck,
Max

11/11/11...a Few Days Late

Ok, I meant to make this post on 11/11/11 but I was dead tired by the end of the day so I wasn't even gonna try, and then a lot of other stuff came up. So its a bit late, but here goes.

A while back, my brother showed me a video for this thing called The Beckoning of Lovely 10/10/10. If you don't know what that is, I recommend you go YouTube it to get the best definition, but I'll try to give you a bit of a description here. Basically, its an event that this amazing woman, Amy Krause Rosenthal, has been putting together for 4 years now at the Bean sculpture in Millennium Park in Chicago. The idea behind each gathering (08/08/08, 09/09/09, 10/10/10, and 11/11/11) has been to beckon lovely back into the world. 08/08/08 was in conjunction with one of Amy's self-made movies, 09/09/09 was a more solitary affair, and 10/10/10 was moving and stunning. 11/11/11 looked to be another wonderful event. It would be the first Beckoning I would be in attendance for. I couldn't wait.

That day, my brother and I woke up early, got to the train station, and traveled to Chicago. We took the bus to Millennium Park and waited patiently for Amy and the yellow umbrella she carried to every beckoning. We chatted and nerded out with the other amazing people already there, going on and on about Nerdfighteria (more about that in another post), Wheezy Waiter, various other YouTube videos, and just the general awesomeness in the air. Then, 11:11am rolled around, and a cheer started to rise through the crowd as a smiling woman with a yellow umbrella made her way to the front.

The day was amazing. We sang together, wished people happy birthdays, sent out "I love you" texts, watched a marriage proposal, were given free candy, saw John Green (YAY!), and overall did our best to beckon lovely back into the world. This all happened as a feature-length movie titled "The Beckoning of Lovely" was released on YouTube. I recommend you watch this movie whenever you get the chance.

In the descriptions for the event on the website, we were all told to bring white pillowcases and sharpies, but not given an explanation as to why. Amy explained that we should draw a large cloud on one side so if anyone said we were "dreaming too much" and "had our head in the clouds" we could say "You bet." Then, she encouraged us to get people to sign our pillowcase so we could remember all the friends we made that day.

A friend of the project handed out temporary tattoos that had a small yellow umbrella and a little message on them: "Make the most of your time here." This has been a big phrase in relation to The Beckoning of Lovely, and I wholeheartedly agree with it. Its something we all need remember; our lives are short. Much too short to spend them angry or jealous or upset or hating or complaining.

Our world is in a rough place right now, but then again, it always has been and always will be. However, just because the world's constantly going insane doesn't mean our own personal worlds have to be. Surround yourself with people you love and who love you in return. Enjoy fun things, and also find the fun in hard work. Support the ones you care about, and never miss a chance to tell them you love them. Read. A lot. Love the little things. Never compromise, but know when to find middle ground. And never, ever, EVER let anyone define who you are but yourself.

In the words of Charles Schulz that someone brought up that day at the Bean, "Be yourself. No one can say you're doing it wrong."

P.S. - I'm dedicating this post to my friend, J.G. She's going through a tough time right now, and I hope that the lovely returns to her life soon. She deserves it. <3

First College Paper

So, I just had a conference with one of my profs regarding the first paper of the class, which is also my first paper of college. It was an argumentative prompt; you had to discuss how you felt Odysseus acted while he tried to complete his homecoming once he landed on the shores of Ithaca, the slaying of the suitors and such. (Those unfamiliar with the Odyssey or those who need a refresher on this portion: click here.)Was he fair? Brutal? Somewhere inbetween?

I went with the third option and made my case, explaining the things that happened and how they showed Odysseus in either a positive or negative light.

I followed the style of arguing I had learned before. You explain what happened ("By the end, Athena is skewing the suitors’ spear throws and making sure that each of the four spears from Odysseus and his men find their mark.") and then tell what this signifies ("This is quite the advantage, and really, anything that Odysseus did to gain the upper hand aside from having the support of a goddess could quite easily be viewed as overkill.")

Apparently, this is style is too forceful for my professor. He wants me to argue my points, not just say things.

Am I incorrect in saying that argument requires evidence? You give evidence, then you explain your stance. How else am I suppose to argue?

I've always been told you need to be strong in your points. Don't say "this suggests" or "this could mean", say "this means" or "this clearly shows" or what have you.

Arguments are supposed to be forceful. You're supposed to convince the reader, and you can't do that if you're simply handing them suggestions and vague stances.

You need to be clear and concise. What's your stance, and what in the text gives you the validation to have that stance?

I guess my point is that I have a writing style, and an argumentative/persuasive writing style. It worked just fine in all my honors and AP English classes. I got very comfortable with it, and my teachers liked it.

Asking me to completely change this style and fix a paper written in said style by Sunday is gonna be a lot to ask.

Especially this weekend. X_x

Wish me luck everyone.

Until next time,
Max

Hello World

So this is my blog. No idea whats gonna go on here, how often I'll post, whatever, but I figured this would be an interesting thing for me to try. I'm starting my first year of college, a new and scary period of my life, and it'll be handy to have a place to vent and talk and such.

Hopefully I can learn a little bit more about myself, and you all can learn a bit about me, too. 

-Max D.